Cool Friends

Barefoot in the Frat House

The thing I find most horrifying about this is that they apparently have a no-shoes policy.  Look at the pile of shoes by the door.  The white socks.  The one guy holding the bong appears to actually be wearing slippers instead of moccassins.

I absolutely loathe having to take my shoes off inside because I'm afraid of stepping on something sharp.  When I was a kid I read a book about the San Fransisco earthquake of 1906, and it said that because the earthquake happened in the early morning while people were still in bed, everyone ran out into the street barefoot and ended up with massive injuries from all the broken glass cutting their feet.  This HORRIFIED me beyond belief.  Way more than the tragedy of people losing their homes or dying.

One of the most terrifying cinematic moments for me is in Die Hard when Hans Gruber tells his henchman to "shoot the glass" so that John McClane has to walk across the broken glass barefoot.  At that point, I basically just want John to give up and let the terrorists win.  I've had it. 

Lending a Helping Hand

Beer Pong Surprise

I was just looking through my gmail Drafts folder and saw a message from months ago with the subject: "balls", and only a link to this photo in the body of the email. No idea who I was planning on sending this to, but I'm glad I rediscovered it.

Kiss the Ring

Knave, doth thou not know to kneel before thy party queen? Thine foul lips are not worthy to kiss the ring on her highness's finger. To even be in the presence of Her Majesty's crown of "Drunk" trucker hat should make thy heart quiver.

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Beerocide

If I were a beer, I'd look at this with my beer goggle eyes and shudder in horror to see a mass grave of the genocide of my peers.

Also, if I were a beer, I think I'd be a Zima.

Rejected Heineken Ad

"Good to the last drop!"

The King Chugs

Thank you, Nate.

Double Breasted Jacket

I can't explain why I love this pic so much, but it's been in my "Favorites" for about a year and I've never figured out exactly what to say about it.  So just please enjoy it.

Basment Beer Bong

One of my favorite party photo tropes is parties that take place in an unfinished basement.  I like to imagine the host inviting people over to hang out next to the boiler and the insulation stuffing. 

Grossest Beer Bong

At first this made me uncomfortable because I was focused on how weird it is to do a beer bong while sitting down.  Something just doesn't seem right - it's not a fine brandy or glass of merlot.  It's like pooping standing up.

Then I looked at what was in that bong.  And it's not beer.  It's some creamy milky substance; it looks like either a bong of Bailey's Irish Cream or else it's some guy named Bailey O'Doyle's special cream if you know what I mean.

Either way, O'Doyle rules.

Good to the Last Drop

My uncle always does this uncle-type joke where he "wrings" the wine bottle when pouring the last out, as if it was a tube of toothpaste that could excrete more if you squeezed it.  This has always cracked me up, and I like to do it myself, laboring under the assumption that others find this equally funny (they probably don't).  The trick is you really have to add the drama - grunt a little and make it seem like you're really using your muscles as you wring the bottle.  Sell it a little.  You have to go whole hog on this uncle-humor to pull it off.

King Tut and His Beeramid

Buried for 10,000 years in his opulent beeramid palace; mummified and prepared for Ra to take him across the river to the Afterlife.  Only a fool would dare to seek the treasures of the Miller Lite from the dead! Lo, the pharaoh awakes! Returned to life to avenge his curse!  *mummy goes on beer run*

Heteronormative Male Socializing

A True Wicked Pissa Gentleman

A true gentleman assists ladies in the proper shotgun technique.

Sharing a Beer with You

Happy Cinco de Mayo!

Here's one of the only photos tagged both "Corona" and "barf".

Hello, Boys!

Beer Pong Grandma

Erin Go Bra-less

Ok, I know it's a week late for St. Patrick's Day, but I was just sent this pic by someone who must've taken it last week.

In a way, these three kind of deserve each other, huh?


Thanks to "Santos Halper"  for the pic.