I was looking for cuddle party photos in hopes of seeing some real unsavory degenerates, but instead I found these goddamn eagle scouts. These turd nuggets are so wholesome with their white teeth and great skin and genuine smiles.
I'm pissed as heck and I am only consoling myself with the hopes that these guys have terrible shoulder bacne.
The aftermath of a party at my pal Julia's parents' place in the 70s (these are not her parents pictured). God, I wish it was the '70s. Everytime I go over to a nice dinner party and suggest a little swinging, everyone acts all huffy and stuckup. Like a little wife-swapping ever hurt anyone?
Jeez, it's 2012 people. If you're not a diaper-lover or wife-swapper, get over yourself. A little '70s partying might do you good.
According to the description on this photo, this guy came to a dinner party where he only knew one person, had two drinks, then fell asleep. His friends put dried pasta all over him.
What I like about this guy is how dapper his outfit is, and how he seems quite handsome. Yet is a total piece of shit who falls asleep at a party.
What worse fate than passing out after praying to the porcelain god than to be screamed at?
When I saw the thumbnail of this photo, I thought that his beard was drawn in by Sharpie. Instead it's just a kind of terrible chinstrap/goatee combo that he actually willfully grew while awake.
When it rains sleepy spittle, it really pours. After yesterday's post of a two sleepy droolers, I immediately got a new email from Eugene with a photo of his roommate passed out and drooling on his laptop. Eugene, you're just lucky that when you find your roommate passed out in front of his computer covered in his own fluids, that it was only spit.
This was just sent to me by reader Kathryn M. - it's her two friends passed out on Franzia after a day at the beach. Now, Kathryn probably thinks that the wanton and hedonistic thing here is drinking until you pass out and drool, but what appalls me is the lack of proper sun protection these two were using. Look at that burned tan line on the boob, soon to be wrinkly chicken neck with sunspots in 30 years.
Protect your skin, people! Use sunblock and reapply every hour! Don't make me yell at you!
This Father's Day, show that you're a real family man with your custom photo belt buckle with your baby's face on it. You'll look like a loving father, even when passed out drunk with wet jeans from pissing yourself!
My friend Kevin just sent me this pic that he found while googling "birthday cake art". It's from an Irish rugby team's website, hidden someonewhere in their Misc files in their parent directory. It's nice to see that totally fucked up shit still happens with Google image searches; it had gotten too clean and effective and totally boring.
Who actually wants to find a picture of what they're actually searching for? No one (except anyone submitting a search query for "justin beiber n00dz").
Thanks to Willy who sent this to me with the description:
This is my buddy after drinking for most of the day. He he was originally leaning on the toilet in case he puked. Later that night he proceeded to puke all over the floor of his house in a different room It's funny because it didn't happen at my house.
The competition for Most Miserable Man is heating up with this pathetic piece of shit, snoozing off while his buddies grind the night away.
Thanks to Mason for the pic.
Who is more miserable?
Stereotypes are bad, and you shouldn't just a book by it's cover....
but at the same time, we see your muttonchop sideburn/handlebar mustache combo, and we know you've passed out drunk at least once in the past year.
