Party World Tour: Scottsdale, AZ

Is it something that's discussed that Scottsdale, Arizona secretly has the trashiest people?  I don't think it is.  So I'll go ahead and explain:  it's like some weird amalgam of Los Angeles and Tampa, Florida, but yet without the charm of either.  It's also the locale of the best TV show ever, Sex Decoy: Love Stings on the Fox Reality channel.  The premise of the show is a private detective agency run by a former stripper MILF and her 3 stripper daughters where set up sting seduction operations on suspected cheaters.  I can't believe this kind off quality programming was canceled.

Anyway, I've never been to Scottsdale, but I'm mostly ok with making hasty judgements based off of photos I've found on Flickr.  It seems whenever I come across a photo of some really wasted blonds in club clothes, it turns out to be Scottsdale.

They look they're from Florida, but with more expensive haircuts and highlights, and yet aren't as stylish or thin as people from California.

Here's what I mean:

I've Found Love

Oh hi! I have some exciting updates about my personal life. I've been so lonely, just sitting here at my computer.
 

But just recently, I met this awesome new guy through cougarlife.com. We have so much in common! I'm so happy, he really "gets" me!  Here he is:

Rejected Heineken Ad

"Good to the last drop!"

Double Breasted Jacket

I can't explain why I love this pic so much, but it's been in my "Favorites" for about a year and I've never figured out exactly what to say about it.  So just please enjoy it.

Masterpiece!

Picasso, Monet, Rembrandt? Who gives a crap about those losers when there are shining beacons of the art world out there like Ashley, who created this masterpiece?

This is what should be painted onto cathedral ceilings, hanging in museums, inspiring the masses!

A Beautiful Portrait

I feel so flattered!  A true artiste has created a portrait of me!  A lifelike rendering of my visage set in my natural milieu - at my computer, surrounded by empty wine bottles and a possible sex toy, wearing sensual delicate lingerie from the Dollar Tree.  Thank you, Chris Metzen for your subtle touch and uncanny eye!

My Favorite Picture

I wish I could post this every day. I just can't get enough of it. Her spirit feels so close to me. I look into her glassy dead eyes and see my own reflection.

Ok, that's all.

Four Hearts Beating as One

Your Girlfriend

The Gang's All Here

Thanks to Jonathan for this.

Happy Belated Mother's Day

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Fellas: Take Your Pick

Burlesque!

The thing about burlesque is that it's really sexy, but the other thing is that the people who are into burlesque are really unsexy.

The Most Beautiful Hairs

Bleached Out

This photo is titled "Spa party!", and I was really hoping that it was a bunch of 13 year olds getting their moustaches bleached.  But alas, it appears they're just doing the "Got Milk?" thing.

I don't know why I'm still posting this, since I've just admitted "I thought this pic would be cool, but it's actually lame."  SUE ME, OK? I STILL LIKE IT.

What's New, Pussycat?

Purrrrrrrrrrr..............

Crazy Straws

Normally, I'm very strict about posting stuff I find myself on Flickr, and I won't post pics that I find on other people's blogs. But sometimes, Life offers you a bump in the form of a photo of a girl snorting coke through a crazy straw that you found on some random person's Tumblr, and it would just be plain rude not to accept. Thanks, Teen Witch.

Prom Queens

This Party Is the Pits

Ok, so I have this thing about hippie women and their love of bare arms/back/shoulders, but their hatred of bare thighs.  Ever notice this?  Hippie girls love spaghetti strap tanks and tube tops, even in winter, but will never wear short-shorts or short dresses/skirts?

This one here really encapsulates my theory with this ill-fitting (notice the seam cutting the bust) halter in what looks like some organic cotton fabric, showing off her hairy pits.

Pink Lady