The Kentucky Derby was this weekend, and who gives a hoot because it's nowhere near as epic as the fucked up insane debauchery that happens at Preakness. They can ban hooligans from the infield, but they can't make people stop being total wasted jerks*.
Plus, this is really the only derby that matters, right?
*See video for "the running of the urnials" at Preakness where people get pelted with 1,000 bud Lite cans while running across the top of port-o-potties. This is what classy horse racing is all about:
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