Thursday, June 10, 2010

Dreadlock Devil

I always imagined that teenage white guys who grow dreadlocks (like the guy I lost my virginity to, who offset the pungent odor of his unwashed hair with healthy spritzes of Curve for Men) must've had some moment where there was an angel on one shoulder saying, "it will look and smell horrible! Don't do it!". And on the other shoulder, a little devil saying, "don't you totally feel in touch with Rastafarianism? You're totally down with the ethos of black men who have created their own vibrant culture in response to suffering through colonialism and hardship! It'll give you total street cred! Chicks love it!"

I thought this was just a metaphor, but it turns out it's actually 100% real.


7 comments:

coorain said...

OMG You're not a virgin? I am shocked and disappointed.

Anonymous said...

I don't get it - the majority of black dreads don't smell - you do wash them as regularly as undreaded hear. What are these white guys doing?

Anonymous said...

boo for mean dread comments. rastas get all the credit but neglecting your hair is easy to see all the way back in cave people and indigenous people. if you take care of your dreads right you wash them once or twice a week which doesn't let them get smelly.

sorry to rain on your funny parade,
serious white girl with dreads

Albondigas said...

OMG. You are the most gutsy ver sharer ever. Hilarious. Glad be a witness to the truth of that statement.

SLEBBO! said...

hahaha¹⁰

Lazer said...

Why is no one seeing the larger picture here? Whether or not dreads can be kept clean, we're overlooking the fact that dreadlocks look stupid on white people 100% of the time.

Also: Just seeing her drink dangerously sandwiched between two of those diseased strands creeps me out.

Anonymous said...

a) HE looks dirty, nevermind those dreads...

b) why is her vagina glowing?