Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Burning Man? More Like.... Burning Stupid-Man

One time I was at a roof party at one of those large buildings in Williamsburg where the residents share the roof.  This was quite a few years ago when a different type of losers and shitheads still lived on the Williamsburg waterfront (as opposed to the current losers and shitheads).  Some other tennants in the building also had some friends on the roof.  They were unsavory hippy types, and one of them started doing this assinine thing with spinning flaming things.  I don't know what the proper name for this activity is, and I don't want to ever know.  It's what's going on in this photo, you know what it is.

My friend Keren started yelling "GO BACK TO BURNING MAN, HIPPIES!" at them, which was the funniest thing to me at the time.  Hippies HATE it when you don't like their stupid fire-dancing displays.  They seemed so hurt and dismayed to be in a hostile environment.  Sorry nerds, Keren does not appreciate you.

This is a cool story about how much I enjoyed bullying some nerds.  I'm a big mean shithead IRL, it turns out.  Sigh.   Whatever, you take one look at this guy, and you know that even though he's a shithead, he gets hecka laid all the time.  Hakuna matata.


Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Wwwwwwwwwwipeout


Monday, January 23, 2012

A Classier Time

The aftermath of a party at my pal Julia's parents' place in the 70s (these are not her parents pictured).  God, I wish it was the '70s.  Everytime I go over to a nice dinner party and suggest a little swinging, everyone acts all huffy and stuckup.  Like a little wife-swapping ever hurt anyone?

Jeez, it's 2012 people. If you're not a diaper-lover or wife-swapper, get over yourself.  A little '70s partying might do you good.


Friday, January 20, 2012

Geezer

If it's not immediately clear how British this guy is, I don't know how to explain British people to you.


Thursday, January 19, 2012

Dong Sleeper

Nice paisley shirt, Prince. Your friends sure have you pegged, "Dong" is right. Speaking of which, while you were passed out, are you sure none of your friends actually pegged you?

Friday, January 13, 2012

Meanwhile at the Luau


Thursday, January 12, 2012

Juggalettes Against Drinking and Driving

I know what you're thinking.  "Gee, Katie, this isn't too interesting.  Some girl drinking a bottle of barcadi out of a plastic take-out cup while in the driver's seat? Snoozefest."


Well would it impress you more if I showed you how this was tagged on Flickr?
Yeah, I thought so.

Monday, January 9, 2012

Facebook vs. Flickr

A lot of the worst photos - worst in the most embarrassing sense - on this blog come to me from people who save the photos from their friends' Facebook accounts, and not ones I find publicly available on Flickr.

I have some qualms about this. Not because I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but because I don't know how much of a purist I should be about the stated mission of "Pictures of Other People's Parties on Flickr". This blog is almost 4 years old (egads), and in 2008 Flickr was much something different than it is today. It seemed like the most important photo sharing site out there. It's still widely used, but it seems more and more that it's used by semi-pro photographers and color saturation enthusiasts. Facebook is now where regular people upload their party pics.

A big part of what I aimed at with this blog was a stern privacy warning - if you are dumb enough to post your photos in a totally public site like Flickr, then you have no way of stopping a shithead like me from making fun of you behind your back. What hubris to think that no one will make fun of you! However, I don't actually want to hurt anyone's feelings, and the handful of times people have asked me to take down their photos, I've always done it. Actually, of those handful of people, there's was one or two that gave a blustery talk about copyright violations and permissions tryin' to sound all legalese-y, and those were the people that I sort of jerked around a little before finally taking their photos down. They deserved to be fucked with a little more.

But Facebook is a different thing. You have a certain level of expectation of privacy on there compared to Flickr. If you set your permission for a photo so it's for "Friends" only, you aren't expecting that your so-called-friend is going to screenshot that photo and send it to a blog that makes fun of people. Also, for me I like the process of searching and finding pics myself. It feels like cheating for someone else to send me a cherry-picked photo from Facebook [NOTE: please do not stop sending me photos!!!].

Of course I'm not saying Facebook is good at privacy. It's a miserable hell-hole and I hate it and it's boring because your aunt and boss is on it, so no one ever posts anything funny or edgy anymore. Twitter is way better (do you follow me? Oh, why not) and it's fun and cool stuff happens on there.

Anyway. Look.  I don't know what more I can say except I'm sorry for these two people in this photo, because their friend is a dick and sent this to me.  And there's no way I couldn't post this.  I wouldn't deprive my loyal readers (luv u guys <3 <3).  So enjoy:


Friday, January 6, 2012

Best Christmas Card Ever

I was just sent this stunning image from someone named Brittnay with this description:

My sister received this from her neighbor for Christmas; along with several paparazzi style snap shots of my unaware bro-in-law and niece while walking their dogs. Photographer or not, that’s fucking creepy.

On another note, I’m more of a Cannon girl myself. I found the Jesus to be difficult to operate.

Yes, this isn't a party photo.  But I can truly say this scan of a Christmas card may be the most magnificent image I have ever posted on this piece of turd blog.  I literally chortled - CHORTLED!- out loud when I saw this. 

The mother and unsettlingly attractive teenage son.  The fact that he's named "Kalen".  The two cats.  The "Jesus" brand-name camera.  Good grief! Nothing could make this more perfect in every screaming detail.  

I want to use this for my own Chistmas cards every year moving forward.  I want to use this as my wedding inviations.  I want this to be on my resume.  I want to just insert this into my first born child's "Name" field on his or her birth certificate.  I want this in every aspect of my life forever.    Please enjoy:


Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Snow White and the Two Boston Terriers


Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Worst Parties of the last 12 years

Look, let's face it: life is a horrible drawn out haunted hayride to the grave, and we're lucky if we have a handful of good memories at the end when the teenage headless horseman shovels the dirt onto our grave.

In this spirit, I present to you the 1st result* on Flickr for the search "worst party 20XX" for the years 2000-20011:

If you made it this far, I commend you, friends.   Happy 2012.

2000:


 2001:

 2002:
  2003:

2004:

2005:

2006:
2007:

2008:
2009:
2010:

2011:

*With a few exceptions for when the 1st result was a band photo (barf) or something totally nonsensical.