Beautiful Ladies

These two photos were sent to me by reader Charlotte.  She clearly has a good eye for lovely ladies.

Toga Party

There's nothing worse than a "sorry I haven't posted in so long" post, but WELP....   The reason is I started a new job where I get to blog about whatever weird crap I find on the internet all day.  Which is amazing and really fun for me.   So please check out BuzzFeed.com where I'm posting all day long or follow me on Twitter because who actually still posts blogspots anymore?  Sighsies.

Deviled Eggs

The great thing about this photo is I found it when I was searching Flickr for the phrase "deviled eggs".

Me, IRL

Most Depressing Bong Hit

This photo is captioned: "my first bong hit back after rehab".

Brony Cookiepuss

A giant cookie cake decorated with Pinkie Pie from "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic".  Goddang these brony fuckers.

Teens on Drugs on the Subway on Film on My Mind

Recently I was taking the subway home on a Friday night - about 8:30pm - and saw these awesome kids fucked up out of their minds on drugs waiting on the platform next to me.  They got on the L train from Union Sq heading into Brooklyn.

I started covertly videotaping them; I waggled my finger in front of the phone screen to give the illusion I was playing Tetris or something instead of videoing.  However, after a while, the guy started to give me a dirty look and started whispering to the girls.  All I heard him say was a hiss: "she looks like she shops at J. Crew."

There's two things that really get me about these kids:

1. It was February in New York, and they're not wearing jackets or even tights. She's wearing a tank top! Where are their jackets?! These crazy kids are going to catch their death out here!

2. It was only 8:30pm.  What kind of even were they on their way to at 8:30pm on a Friday that they had ALREADY taken drugs for?  Is there an early bird special at the drug dealer's or something?

I consider filming these kids my finest moment, and I'm so happy to share it with you:

Barefoot in the Frat House

The thing I find most horrifying about this is that they apparently have a no-shoes policy.  Look at the pile of shoes by the door.  The white socks.  The one guy holding the bong appears to actually be wearing slippers instead of moccassins.

I absolutely loathe having to take my shoes off inside because I'm afraid of stepping on something sharp.  When I was a kid I read a book about the San Fransisco earthquake of 1906, and it said that because the earthquake happened in the early morning while people were still in bed, everyone ran out into the street barefoot and ended up with massive injuries from all the broken glass cutting their feet.  This HORRIFIED me beyond belief.  Way more than the tragedy of people losing their homes or dying. 

One of the most terrifying cinematic moments for me is in Die Hard when Hans Gruber tells his henchman to "shoot the glass" so that John McClane has to walk across the broken glass barefoot.  At that point, I basically just want John to give up and let the terrorists win.  I've had it. 

The Big Chill Upskirt

Clean Cut Cuddle Party

I was looking for cuddle party photos in hopes of seeing some real unsavory degenerates, but instead I found these goddamn eagle scouts.  These turd nuggets are so wholesome with their white teeth and great skin and genuine smiles.

I'm pissed as heck and I am only consoling myself with the hopes that these guys have terrible shoulder bacne.

Humiliating Head Gear

I was completely delighted by this old photo and the funny hats they're wearing at a New Year's Eve party.

I starting thinking about the downfall of the noble Party Hat happened with those stupid 200X glasses. Although in this photo, the real humiliation is how poorly it was color-corrected and "denoised".

Pigs in a Baja Blankey

I don't have a lot of talent for most things, but one thing I am good at is being the person at a party who talks to the cops and convinces them not to shut down the party and that we'll just turn down the music.  The trick is just to be nice and polite.  That's not really a cop-trick, that's a life-trick.  Just always be nice, you jerks.

Anyway, it's nice to see the guy in the striped drug-rug pullover is using that same technique.  Although, to be fair, I'd love to see that guy get tasered and cuffed for the crime of wearing a ski hat with tassles when it's clearly not cold out. 

Lending a Helping Hand

It's a Shame About Evan

Evan Dando has a Twitter account that's strange and rambling, and yes, it's really him.

He's not shy about posting pics of his post-show partying at all [note the white lines on the coffee table]. Holy fuck.

Badass Krew